Second Chances

Chapter 3

It had been about a week since I had came back home, to Pennsylvania. I had hung out with my mom, Gwen and Ethan (reluctantly), and Uncle Ty and Aunt Riley. Today, I was watching Laura. Ethan was hanging out with Gwen. So surprising. Not. Laura was playing with her toys when she suddenly asked,
"Where's Ethan?"
"Uh, out."
"Awe..." she continued with her toys, a little sad.
I was a bit confused. She never seemed disappointed before about Ethan.
"Laura, why are you disappointed that Ethan isn't here?"
"Well, he came and played with me yesterday, I was hoping he would play with me again."
"Wait, he was with you yesterday?"
"Yes." she looked at me, then went back to her toys again.
I thought for a second. He said that he went to see Gwen yesterday. Was he lying? I told Laura to get her jacket, we were going for a walk. I took her to the park and let her play. Suddenly, Ethan came out of nowhere.
"Ethan!" Laura jumped for joy.
"Ethan?" I questioned.
Ethan sort of just looked at me. I guessed that he figured that I found out. He went over to Laura, gave her a hug, and started playing with her. I was a little shocked, at first, then I started to smile. When he saw me looking, he started to blush. I had never seen him blush before. Finally, they were done playing and we took Laura home. Ethan held her because she was falling asleep.
"Wow, you're really good with her."
"Well, she's my new little buddy."
I smiled at him and sort of just looked at him, a little bit curiously. Then I said,
"I didn't know Gwen was living with my aunt and uncle. I was almost positive she was staying with HER aunt and uncle." I said sarcastically.
I eyed him as he stared forward. Finally, he said,
"I was curious."
"About what?"
"I was curious about what college you were going to. So, instead of going to Gwen's, I went to your uncle and aunt's house. Sadly, they were in a hurry and needed a babysitter. For some reason, they couldn't get a hold of you."
I remembered that my phone kept acting up yesterday.
"Well, isn't that great! Look, you'll eventually find out where I am going! Why are you so impatient?!" I whispered loudly.
Laura stirred a little but stayed asleep. We got to her house and let Uncle Ty take her. We left and started back home. I was extremely irritated. How could he go around me like that?
"Claire?"
Ethan grabbed my hand and stopped me. Tingles went down my arm. I hated feeling like that when I wanted to be mad at him.
"What do you want?"
"Please don't be angry."
"Why shouldn't I be angry?! You totally went around me and didn't even ask! Why do you care so much where I will go? It's no big--"
"Deal? NO BIG DEAL?! It is a VERY big deal! I don't want to lose you!"
"You won't lose me! And what does it matter if you do, huh? You have Gwen! I am starting to think more and more that you're just here for her!"
"I'm not here for her! I am here for you!"
"Whatever you say! I don't care anymore! You're not worth it!"
I turned away and walked faster. He followed me and yelled,
"Worth what?"
I stopped dead in my tracks. I realized I let something slip. I whispered,
"Nothing."
He walked in front of me and faced me. He came closer and closer until we were practically nose to nose. He said lightly,
"Worth what?"
His voice was deep but calm. Tears were streaming down my face as I looked into his bright green eyes. He wiped my tears away softly.
"I don't know." I said.
I thought if I said that, he would pull away. He didn't, though. So, knowing what was going to happen next, I pulled away. Ethan looked at me, still in his trance. I simply looked at him and said,
"I'm not going to let you hurt me again."
I turned and walked home. He knew the way so I wasn't worried about him. The tears kept coming.
***
I woke up the next day, got changed, and went down town. I went through each store, remembering the old times I had in each one. I went into the old music store that I remembered the most and started looking through some cds.
When I found a good one, I went to check out. Before I did, something caught my eye. It was a black, six string, acoustic guitar. As soon as I saw it, I wanted it. I picked it up and started to play it. Each cord called out to me. I knew how to play many instruments but the guitar was my favorite. I had taken lessons for many instruments over the summer in that shop. I would secretly practice in my room back in London. The person that taught me to play guitar just happened to be my old boyfriend, Logan.
"You can buy that for $299.99." said a voice from behind.
The voice sounded familiar.
"No, saving up for college." I replied with a slight grin as I turned around and saw Logan.
I wasn't surprised. Logan always had this thing with sneaking up on me. I got used to it after a while. I put the guitar back and started for the counter. He went back and started putting my cd in a bag.
"That'll be thirteen dollars plus a 'hello.'"
"Hello Logan, it's nice to see you." I smiled gently as I paid for my stuff and took the bag.
He gave me his famous, perfect smile and dazzled me with his beautiful blue eyes. His dirty blonde hair was a shaggy mess and he was wearing a t-shirt and capri shorts. I sort of giggled at his shorts.
"What?" he asked as I giggled.
"Nothing."
"Really, what?" he smiled.
His smile always got me.
"I was just remembering the day when it was extremely hot and you were wearing shorts but I was still wearing jeans."
Then, Logan laughed (his laugh even sounded perfect) and said,
"Oh yeah, I told you that you couldn't complain about being hot because it was your choice to wear jeans. Then, you hit me and I grabbed your hand and..." he trailed off as his smiled went down.
"And then we had our first kiss together." I said for him.
He sort of looked hurt but tried to smile.
"I-I should go." I said stuttering a bit.
"I'll come with you, I was just about to go on break."
I awkwardly nodded and stood there for a moment while he grabbed his keys. We walked out the store and he locked it up.
"When did you get the keys for the store?" I asked.
I knew his fathered owned the store but his father never let him have the keys.
"When I graduated. My dad thought I was ready so he gave me the keys and said, 'After college, this place is yours.'"
I was a little shocked but I smiled. We went down the street and got a coffee. We talked a lot about what we have been doing with our lives since we broke up. Two summers ago, we dated. It went on to the end of the summer but I realized I had to end it. Long distance relationships never worked out; not to me, anyways. There was also something else (more like someone else) keeping me from the relationship. We talked a little more when Logan suddenly said,
"I need to ask a question that I have been dying to ask for a while."
"What?"
"Why did we break up? I mean, I know it was because of the long distant thing but it felt like there was something more."
I sort of looked at him. His eyes were so beautiful. I couldn't lie to him but I couldn't tell him the truth. He was the first good boyfriend I had. Collin might have been my first, but he was nowhere near good, he cheated. Logan was a great guy. Part of me still liked him. I couldn't answer him.
"Was there another guy?" he asked looking a bit scared.
"No, not technically." He gave me a look of confusion. "I wasn't with another guy. I had feelings for another guy."
"Oh...who?"
"He's just this guy. I would rather not talk about it. I am trying to get over him."
"Oh..." he said with a sigh.
"Logan, I am sorry. I didn't want to feel that way for another guy. You were such a great boyfriend. You deserve someone who will love you."
I looked away. His blue eyes were piercing me. I didn't want to see him hurt. Suddenly, I felt a hand on my chin. Logan lifted my face to look at him in the eyes.
"You want to come to this party I'm throwing on Saturday? It's going to be at the store and it'll be fun."
"I-I-I d-don't know."
"Come on."
"Uh, no, I can't."
"Why?"
"Because it sounds like your asking me out."
"Maybe I am." he grinned.
"I just told you I was trying to get over a guy and you ask me out? How does that work?"
"It's simple; to forget about this guy, be with me. We can pick up where we left off."
"I don't know."
"Come on, we can try again. Everyone deserves a second chance."
I looked at him, his eyes getting to me. I didn't know what to say. He brought himself closer and kissed me. I almost forgot how great his kisses were. He pulled away right when I was getting into it. He whispered in my ear,
"Think about it."
Logan smiled at me, kissed my head, and walked back to the shop. I got up and ran. I knew exactly where I wanted to go. I ran and ran until I was there. I laid on the grass and closed my eyes. I touched my lips. I did want him, I think.